There’s nothing more disappointing than arriving at work to discover that your snacky oh-god-when’s-lunch? fruit got damaged in transit.

Apparently without buying one of those off-putting banana cases, you’re not going to get one to work unscathed. As if that’s the only fruit that requires an awkward moving solution.

There’s a yawning gap in the every-man market here.

It seems that I have found the most space-effective and easy mode of transport for round, soft fruits (arguably, the worst to carry on your person).

As I nestled a ripe nectarine into each of my gym shoes, I made a very stern mental note to wash my fruit before eating it.

When I arrived at the office they looked impeccable. I put them on my desk with the rest of my crap and then immediately got caught up in trying to get as much work done as quickly as possible.

Half way through eating the first, I realised that I was ingesting my very own gym shoe bacteria.

It’s almost nice to have more important things to worry about than where your food has been.

What isn’t nice is how little I have going on, which is something I realised half way through writing this post.

When you blog about triumphing over foot bacteria, you’re a winner and a loser.